May 7, 2018: Research and Development

The past two weeks have been incredibly busy for me and my fellow Concept Development students as we were preparing our pitches to the professors to be green-lit. After countless late nights and long hours, we finally pitched them on Friday, May 4. Prior to this, we presented our pitches to the class for feedback. After such a long time away from the blog, I wanted to share what I have created and accumulated over the past week.

One new addition I made to the pitch was the title: Welcome to Mercury Bay. I renamed the town to Mercury Bay as a play on words. Project Mercury was the first American spaceflight program in the early 1960s, and was a major source of pride and optimism for the country during the Cold War. However, the element, Mercury, is toxic to humans and the idea of a poisonous bay represents the promising town's eventual derailment and decline.

The logo I designed for the film is based on signs featuring the Googie design, like the iconic sign for Las Vegas. This logo would also be featured in the film to present the title, and with additional rust, it is meant to give the audience an immediate introduction to the world they are in.

I even included this on the cover page of my page, which was influenced by some of the graphic design from the time.

Another addition I did was I created several beat boards for my story, in an effort to better represent my vision and the story.

1. Duncan, Ryan and Zack have set up a little camp to investigate UFO sightings, based out of an old gas station on the outskirts of town. Duncan is the only one interested. Ryan and Zack are both exhausted and want to leave.

2. Duncan says he heard about the UFOs from Mr. Winters. Ryan looks at Mr. Winters in the distance and is not convinced.

3. Ryan and Zack give up and walk back into town. Ryan wants to have a cigarette first.

4. Zack notices a beam of light in the distance, leading up to a dark mass in the sky. The mass is slowly approaching.

5. People begin getting pulled up into the sky, including Mr. Winters, who does not even acknowledge what is going on around him. He is simply rambling to himself.

6. Zack runs back to warn his friends but neither listen to him. Ryan is simply trying to get his lighter to work and Duncan is too focused, looking through his telescope that is pointed in the wrong direction.

7. A beam shines down on Zack and he slowly starts levitating. He yells "HELP!" to Ryan, who finally notices and tries to help.

8. Ryan begins to get pulled up as well. He must get Duncan's attention as well, but Duncan is too preoccupied. Ryan figures the only way to get his attention is to throw a rock at him.

 

9. Duncan comes to see what's going on and while he tries to help, he also tries to get a picture of the UFO in the sky. Ryan does not appreciate this.

10. Ryan tries kicking the phone out of his hand and accidentally kicks Duncan in the head instead.

11. Duncan's grip loosens and he realizes he must actually help his friends. However, his hands slip and his friends get pulled up into the darkness in the sky.

12. Duncan is left alone, stunned and numbed by what he saw. He is crushed by his loss of his friends. He stays there for several hours until sunrise. 

13. Out of nowhere, he friends are dropped out of the sky.

14. Ryan and Zack are exhausted but not traumatized like Duncan expected, but they reveal it was a party onboard the UFO. They rub it in and brag to him about the experience.

15. Duncan still boasts that he got his photos, but when he looks at them, they are all useless.

16. The characters all head back into town. Mr. Winters is dropped off at his trailer, still babbling to himself and not acknowledging what has happened to him.

After my presentation to the class, I got some bits of feedback. One recommendation was to emphasize the gags in my beat boards. The idea was that my story was a comedy and the gags themselves would help sell the pitch, and my original beat boards lacked As a result, I went back and added a number of beat boards, specifically 2, 5, 8, 10, 15, and 16. For instance, I added the boards such as the close up of Duncan's phone as well as the gags with slapstick, such as Duncan getting kicked or hit with a rock. Without some of these, the pitch loses a lot of the humor, and makes it much more bland.

Another bit of feedback I received was to include references to Mr. Winters. In the book, Ideas for the Animated Short, the authors discuss the "Bus Stop Structure," where a secondary character comes into the story and drives it and helps solve the problem. This does NOT follow the bus stop structure, however, when discussing the structure, the authors advise readers that the character must be essential. Otherwise, it is a waste of time to model, texture and rig a 3D character. While Mr. Winters is not one of the core main characters, he provides multiple gags as well as some flavor for the world and story. This advice is in line with the feedback from the pitch, which was basically if he does not contribute, I should not include him in the character section. He helps provide some motivation for Duncan by telling him about the UFO activity, and also shows what kind of strange individuals may populate the area.

Another piece I worked on was character, with more solid, clean designs with color, including Mr. Winters.

After reading the "Building Story" chapter from Ideas for the Animated Short, I see my story is a mix of "Linear Narrative" and "Circular Structure". For instance, we see Duncan realize the importance of his friends once he sees they are in jeopardy and evolve. However as we get to the resolution, the characters return to home, back where they belong, ready to have more adventures together in the future. Only this time, they are more appreciative of each other.

Another topic the chapter deals with is rising intensity of conflict. Looking at the events leading up to the climax, I see elements of mental jeopardy when Zack is trying to warn his friends, physical jeopardy when he and Ryan are both being pulled into the sky. Throughout the sequence, there is an increase activity as each character becomes involved when the UFO arrives. Lastly the expenditure of energy is crucial to the climax, because it represents Duncan deciding to put all his effort into helping his friends.

Another thing I have worked on is my world. When I worked on my "World" assignment, I tended to focus more on the all-encompassing world of Mercury Bay. However, I went and found more examples of the type of gas station I want the main characters to build their makeshift camp.

Another thing I began looking for was some of the equipment the characters begin using. For this, I want the characters to use somewhat dated technology, as though they went scavenging through the abandoned buildings and scrounged this equipment and made a makeshift system to track UFOs.

Overall, now that the pitches are over, I want to dive into the deeper, more intricate details of the characters, their world and everything in between. Since the presentation in class, I have placed more emphasis on the humor and gags in the story. Looking at what I have now, I am much happier with the humor and direction this concept is moving in.